Photo taken by the talented Tamren Estevez
Saturday, January 29, 2011
Friday, January 28, 2011
365 photos
Today I begin with my photo a day project.
Its not a terribly wonderful photo but thats not really what I am going for.
Not sure what I am going for, maybe just some consistency and a way to track my mood/health blah blah as the year goes on.
So today is the 28th of January 2011. Here we go.
Friday, January 14, 2011
His other life
he wears a silk shirt on Sundays, he prays with his eyes open. and no one knows that he is devout. the finger nails are long, they scrape back skin cells, they scrape back folds. in the night he screams into his pillow. only sometimes. only when his wife slumbers, heavy, hard. hes bleeding beneath his socks, under the ankle line. he is bleeding in his shoes and his heart is pumping useless. no one knows how devout he is.
thunder, the wigs are on fire, the cheese ate itself, the wind is pregnant with his spit, his words, his tantrums. he slips into the bathroom and stares out the window. the night is cold, the glass is frozen, he sits on his haunches now and he breathes through his mouth, he breathes through his mouth so that his breath is hot and melts the frost and then it freezes again and he begins again.
the wife never leaves the house, she spends her time dusting one room out of twelve. she spends her nights pretending to sleep. her husband lies, she knows, he lies about walking the dog, who sits meek and lumpy, who eats too much. he lies about his emotions, she knows. she knows that one day he will leave her, and she knows that the day he does she will step outside for the first time since she was thirty-two.
thunder, the wigs are on fire, the cheese ate itself, the wind is pregnant with his spit, his words, his tantrums. he slips into the bathroom and stares out the window. the night is cold, the glass is frozen, he sits on his haunches now and he breathes through his mouth, he breathes through his mouth so that his breath is hot and melts the frost and then it freezes again and he begins again.
the wife never leaves the house, she spends her time dusting one room out of twelve. she spends her nights pretending to sleep. her husband lies, she knows, he lies about walking the dog, who sits meek and lumpy, who eats too much. he lies about his emotions, she knows. she knows that one day he will leave her, and she knows that the day he does she will step outside for the first time since she was thirty-two.
Thursday, April 22, 2010
Friday, April 9, 2010
the shepard
anais sings and i have no choice but to listen.
anais sings and all i want to do is sing along.
anais sings and all i want to do is sing along.
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
the easiest
the easiest thing in the world is to stay quiet. kristen painted my face. it looked frightening but also lovely. lovely like some dead warrior or a fury. now i try to scrub and rub it away. it hurts. i am patched and andres hanna and kristen are making chicken nuggets.
today i bought a book. today i sang real loud, then my mom came in and told me to be quiet. while i was singing i felt real good, like i was connecting to someone or something. i remember eating at the blue star diner with alex hall. and we dreamed up some funny idea, some funny little world where we owned a diner and worked there and smoked cigarettes off the back porch. the food was great.
today i bought a book. today i sang real loud, then my mom came in and told me to be quiet. while i was singing i felt real good, like i was connecting to someone or something. i remember eating at the blue star diner with alex hall. and we dreamed up some funny idea, some funny little world where we owned a diner and worked there and smoked cigarettes off the back porch. the food was great.
Thursday, February 11, 2010
today was a snow day
today was a snow day and it felt good. black out then white out and its good to be here. In the recent weeks I have found a new sense, it tastes like something familiar and nothing that I know. Drank 99 bananas and passed out yesterday, feels like a month ago. a year ago. this is not the same time. And today was a snow day and i laughed so hard. it would be nice to start reading more. it would be nice to have a routine. but ive never really done that before. pretty neat to have things be all flighty and shit, never know what you're gonna get. its nice, but its tired. i do actually have energy when i want to, thats something fun to know. today was a real person.
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